I hesitated to post this because I felt conflicted for two reasons. First, I want my friends to know I welcome the chance to pray for them and their children. It means a lot to me to support other parents, especially when their children are going through difficult times. However, the second reason is more painful for me: hearing detailed stories about traumatic events and close calls can be overwhelming. My imagination tends to fill in the gaps too vividly, especially in stories involving suicide, trauma, and near-death experiences. Despite my reservations, I decided to share my thoughts, hoping they'll be received in the spirit they are intended.
I can't tell you how relieved I am that you won't have to go through what I have. When you asked, I prayed hard for your child, hoping for the best. People say misery loves company, but I think it really seeks comfort. I would never want another parent to feel the heartbreak of losing a child. If I could make one change in the world, it would be to ensure no parent ever has to bury their child, whether from sickness, accidents, or anything else. I wish every parent could pass away knowing their child will carry on after them.
Unfortunately, we don't live in that perfect world. So, when I heard your child made it through that serious incident, I was incredibly relieved. You can bring them home from the hospital, provide them with counseling, help them heal, and move forward together. On the other hand, I faced the unbearable task of meeting my daughter at the funeral home and choosing her casket. I had to say goodbye to my daughter in a way no parent should. While you face the holidays with both shadows and joy, grateful for a second chance to make memories, I will face another holiday without my daughter. Her absence at our dinner table and by the Christmas tree will be deeply felt, her stocking empty.
When I shared how difficult it is for me to hear every detail of your child's ordeal, you seemed upset and even offended, which hurt me deeply. Remember, you reached out to me for support, not the other way around. You asked me to pray for you, and despite everything, I did wholeheartedly. I'll continue to do so, even if you might not realize how your words affect me. Because that's what a broken heart does—it keeps asking for mercy.
With all my heart,
A Broken Hearted Mama
